Life as a Wife: One Year Later
Simone and Martin Photography
Happy Monday! It’s a celebratory week, because it marks one year since I strutted down the aisle to see my groom. Our official anniversary is not until Sunday. In true newlywed fashion, though, we’ll be celebrating all week— wine, dinner, flowers (hopefully my husband is reading this).
Year one included a lot of “firsts” for us. One— we moved in together. In fact, we hadn’t even lived in the same state until five days prior to our big day. We still like each other, so that’s a plus. Next— we did a lot of traveling, which confirmed my affinity for fruity cocktails by the beach. We also bought a house, made some career moves and most importantly… tried hot yoga.
People often ask me about the highs and lows of this first year. Perhaps the most comforting takeaway has been our ability to work through changes together, whether small or significant.
So, with that, here are the top five lessons I’ve learned as a newlywed…
1. ESPN RULES. Yep. SportsCenter is on all day. We often battle between watching ESPN and Dancing with the Stars. ESPN and The Bachelorette. ESPN and Friends reruns. Bottom line: ESPN wins. Ladies— buy a second TV, get used to DVR-ing your favorite sitcoms and learn to love some College GameDay drama.
2. PLANS CHANGE. Life throws us a lot of curveballs we’re never prepared for. We can’t pencil in promotions or begin packing for an unplanned move. We can’t expect to lose someone we love or to tackle a challenge we haven’t been handed yet. I’ve said before, you’ve got to love the process over the plan, and be willing to tackle that process with the person you love.
3. CARNIVORES REIGN. I spent a lot of years eating yogurt and granola for dinner. As you can imagine, such a meal is not on my husband’s list of favorites. Carnivores reign, which means there’s a lot more meat in the fridge… and a lot more beer to go with it.
4. BALANCE IS BOGUS. Achieving the perfect work/home balance is unrealistic. Work comes home with us, and similarly, home life occasionally spills into the office. There will be points when our careers require more of us, and other points when we’re needed more at home. Set priorities, communicate and trust life’s imperfect rhythms.
5. LOVE PREVAILS. I wasn’t expecting to feel different post-marriage. However, there is certainly a warmth, a comfort and a specific calmness that now exists between us. Indeed, love prevails… except, when ESPN is on. Then, sports prevail. Ah, imperfections.